You can't always get what you wantl

But if you try sometimes, you'll find you get what you need.

It's the phrase I have been singing to whiney "I want's" for over  15 years.  Grade school and middle school age kids roll their eyes and groan but preschooler burst into giggles.  I think the air guitar helps.  Honestly singing the chorus of the Rolling Stones famous song is a great way to diffuse a case of the "I wants."  It's funniest when little kids start initiating it to others when their friends are lamenting their wants.

I confess it is the chorus that has been going through my head this week.  Here is a quick summary of where Peter is at. Peter was dismissed from the hospital Monday afternoon.  He is back in his apartment.  I am grateful to  mom for providing it's availability to keep him from having to deal with the eviction process.  It is available to him through the end of his 2 month notice which ends June 30th. In spite of great efforts on my part as well as that of others, a residential transitional program was not available to him.  The main obstacle was his very limited insurance policy.  Out of pocket cost were around $100,000 for the recommended three month stay. It was quite frustrating.  I was "knocking on doors" up to the hour before I picked him up.  

Peter is on two new medications and appears to be compliant with taking them.  I was very aware of the mania he was experiencing but was unaware of the crying and depression he was under.  He seems less aware of the mania effects but wants to keep away the crying/depression part so currently is motivated to take the medication.  With this in place he is pretty much back to what I would call his typical self.  It's nice to see.  There are many things I am grateful for.  

• We were able to see his psychiatrist within 24 hours of getting home which was great.  I really appreciate her and was glad to get her in the loop.
• Peter was able to get his job at the bowling alley back.  (Midway through his hospital stay I discovered his bowling alley employee shirt which clued me in to that being his place of work.) This is likely temporary but I am grateful for it.  He needs the social and the income.
• Peter is communicative with me and the hostility is gone.  He's still kind of goofy and annoying but it's the Peter I expect and appreciate.
• So far no negative side effects from the medication.
• Grateful for the provision of his apartment and the time it allows him to figure out the next step.

Of course there are lots of concerns and questions about what is next.

• A place to live come July that is more centrally located to town and me.
• A job that works well with that location (and his walking feet) as well as gives him purpose and the right kind of community
• Payment of medical bills that are surely to come in as well as provision for a needed surgery by the end of the year.
• Peer group - that he would be willing to participate in NAMI's peer support group or we could find some kind of helpful therapist that he would be willing to see.
• We are looking for a few small furniture items for his apartment.
• That he will get in the routine of taking his medication. 
• Wisdom for the doctors in figuring out the best medication and dosages with minimal side effects that allow Peter to be his truest personality.
• For me to know what and how to ask others to help him.  I feel really strongly about him needing a sense of support and community but not always sure how to get others involved.

I may not have gotten what I wanted but I fully trust in God that he has heard your prayers and has and will continue to provide what we need.