What takes more faith?

Faith is a funny thing.  What can require faith for one person may be just the opposite for another.  It is very personal.  And often it looks as if it takes faith to go either direction when a choice presents itself.  So which one requires more faith?

I have been asking God for the means to send Peter to Riverside Military School.  I have decided to believe he will and presently act as if it is so.  I have told God I am open to how he wants to do it - gifts, scholarship, sweepstakes winnings, or even a new job.  I have made the need known, entered sweepstakes and kept my ears open to job opportunities. I recently learned of a job opening.  A new career  in a totally unrelated field. There were so many perks that provided "security" that I thought this just might be God's answer.  I would go back and forth though as I considered if I could really do the work and adjust to a new schedule. I kept trying to look at 'applying for the job' or 'letting it pass' in terms of "acting in faith."  On the surface it looked like it would take more faith to pursue a job I felt extremely challenged by.  But I realized that perhaps it took just as much faith to pass it by trusting that God would provide in another way.  

I think truthfully that for pride's sake, I want to be the one that works to earn this education for Peter. It is hard to accept help from others.  It hurts my pride.  Deep down there is the part of me that feels like I have to be the one to make the sacrifice for this.  I feel responsible and believe that somehow I am going to have to "do something" maybe even "suffer and sacrifice" to make this happen. So in the end I realized it takes more faith to pass this job by than to pursue it. I was pursuing it out of fear.  Fear that this must be God's provision and if I didn't chase after it, I would miss it.  This job was not simply a challenge, it was totally out of my gifting and interest. I realized that it was just not a good fit for me or the employer therefore I chose not to pursue it.  

It's not the first time I have been in this place of "faith is waiting."  I do believe that God who started this journey will provide what is needed.  I still can't figure out the "how in the world!" This isn't the first time I have been in this place though. There have been other times when I have tried to figure out how I could make something happen when God (without my help) did more than I could have ever imagined.